Please Help…Emotionally Drained Over Pisces Friendship?
First, I apologize for this being so long! I have a male Pisces friend. I’m an Aries female, and we work together. I work in one of our offices and he works in another. In the time we have known each other he has been nice to me. However lately his behavior is confusing me and leaving me feeling emotionally drained. We have carried on and had fun, but now I feel like he is pushing me away. See he has a lot going on in his life right now. He has been very overwhelmed with his job, and his wife is expecting a baby very soon. He is going through a tough time right now. The thing is at times it is like he wants to have me around him all the time, like he’ll call me and ask me to come over to visit him and his family, I helped him get things ready for their baby, he invited me out with his family for new years, or he’ll carry on with me at work. But recently it is like when I try to talk to him, he pushes me away. I used to see him everyday because I would travel from my building to his. Now I only see him twice a week. He would tell me every time that he did see me that he missed me.
This week I had to cover for my boss while he was on vacation, so I had to work in his building all week, on the other side of his desk. On Monday I found out that I am now a diabetic. So I told him on Tuesday, and started to cry. He came and sat at my desk and patted my shoulder and told me that “I can face this or I can hide”. That he thinks “I am a survivor because of all of the other things I have been through in my life. And that he thinks I am a strong-willed person”. So I told him that I don’t know if I can do this and want to hide. He said “You can’t hide because I will come and find you. You can’t hide if I can’t hide”. Now what does that mean? What is he hiding from? Every time he would leave or come to his desk he would peek over the partition to look at me. I didn’t look up every time, but I could see him out of the corner of my eye. So I got to thinking about what he had thought about me, so I went home that night and made him a little paper with all of the things that I thought about him. I gave it to him on Wednesday, and he hung it up in his cubcle. I didn’t tell him anything mean, I told him all of his good traits as well as I think that he is a person who is overwhelmed, needs to be appreciated, needs to feel loved and secure, and is a person who can put up a “front” to hide their true feelings.
Well ever since then he is now acting weird toward me. Yesterday was my last day working with him because my boss will be back next week. I will go back to only seeing him twice a week now. So when I came in he made the comment “it’s your last day”. I said “yeah I’m going back to my own sandbox, I can’t play with the big kids here”. Then he said “yeah I’m sure they missed you”. And that was it. Then lunchtime came and he and some other guys went with the new girl to lunch. I couldn’t go because I have to watch what I eat now, but I was hurt that he didn’t even ask if I wanted to go. So now it is like he tries not to be around me or talk to me as little as possible.
What did I do? How can he just be nice or want to be around me only when he wants to? Can someone tell me what to do? Should I just ignore him from now on? (which is not in me) I care about him very much. It hurts me to see him be in so much pain. Do you think he is confused about me? I can’t keep doing this because it is hurting me so much deep down. He and I have so many things in common and I feel like we share a lot of the same thoughts and feelings. He has even commented at times if we were “separated at birth” because we are so much alike. If anyone could tell me what they think is wrong with him or me and what is going on, what I should do, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks.